This list was sent by a preemie mom and I found it hit the spot for where I am today/week.
I was thinking of a little list of what preemie parents do and don't deserve:
We do deserve:
1. Lots of hugs and support
2. A pat on the back once in awhile
3. To put ourselves first
4. Movie night!!!
5. Date night!!!
!6. To be pissed off
7. Good shows on TV
8. Down time
9. A good book
10. A hot fudge sundae
11. A break from the kids
12. To vent
13. To be angry
14. To be angry at God
We do not deserve:
1. To have people tell us that you need to be strong for your kids: HELLO!!! Like we're not strong for our kids???!!!!!
2. To have people tell us that the situation can't be helped and you just have to deal with it: HELLO AGAIN!!! Yes, it CAN be helped and no we don't have to "DEAL" with it. Sometimes parents need a break. This isn't the middle ages here people! We don't exist just to be miserable. We are human beings and we need to be happy. We just do. Sometimes we need to just have time for OURSELVES!!! !!!!
3. Judgment! ESPECIALLY when people haven't been through what we have been through
4. Those odd NICU nurses who don't "play well" with parents: I am sure that you all have at least one or two of those. You know the ones who usually pick those shifts (usually graveyard) so they don't have to deal with the parents. Well, HELLO!!! Parents come in at all hours!!! If it were me I'd fire 'em. No offense to all the wonderful graveyard NICU nurses though
5. To have our kid(s) die.
6. Well, any of this to be quite frank... we did not deserve to go into labor early, we did not deserve the long NICU stay, the multiple baggings, etc.